Wednesday, 11 July 2012

Minor Road Bump or Major Obstacle ?? :\


“You are a Marwari, finance is in our blood”, said daddy dearest; “Keep cribbing and crying and still get good grades, Dude! You are meant for finance”, said best friend. And I, at my confused best, decided to take the plunge. I wouldn’t say that my decision to take up Finance majors was entirely based on what others thought but right from the start I had been someone who needed a little push to get things going. Pretty much like good old sexy-and-voluptuous Ambassador cars.
‘And as she got down from her swanky SUV, her Jimmy Choo pumps highlighted her well defined legs resulting from the religious workouts , her skirt well ironed and the pastel blouse accesorised with diamonds and pearls , just perfect for the day’s meeting, she was greeted by her colleagues. They chit chatted about the last evening's party and also discussed the days plan. Everybody knew how she was, a workaholic by the day and a total chill out machine by the evenings. And needless to say, one of the most popular office chic in the sky kissing 50 floor glass structure.’ Now, doesn’t that sound like it’s been cut out from some Hollywood movie? Exactly, that’s exactly how I wanted my life to be. At least some parts of it.  

Ever since I know, I have craved this life, big deals, swanky offices, heritage offices and the likes. And I sincerely believed an MBA would enable me to kick start this journey if not fulfil it totally. The initial period was fine with generic subjects to study, though Stats and Operations Management made my life hell. Every time I sat through those lectures I felt was sitting on an automated grating machine, shredding away my ass, that’s how bad it was.
And then came the crossroads, when we had to choose our Major streams, and as I already said, I took the plunge. Everybody was happy, I was too. The awe on peoples’ faces when they learnt that I had taken up Core Finance was like a Chocolate and Wine wrap for my ego, to say the least. And, like all good things, this too had to end. 

As classes are progressing  and the semester is moving forward, the cake-walk  is  becoming more and more of a walk-on-the-Indian-roads, with too many potholes and puddles and cow-dung to appeal to the senses. The fascination of finance is wearing off and I stand here struggling to cope up.
A dream that I harnessed, a wish that I made and I goal that I wanted to achieve, it all seems so impossible right now! The horizon seems nowhere in sight and all that I can see till far far away is the sea, which scares me, the sea, with unknown depths and  buried treasures, calling me to explore, to dive deep and come out new and polished. But I am scared. Of being lost, of drowning. 

But as they say, success is 99 percentage hard work and 1 percentage luck; I try to put in the 99 percentage and just hoping that the 1 percentage will take care of itself. Though, it seems pretty much impossible to me right now, with rock bottom levels of confidence and sky high levels of nervousness, I just hope that all this turns out to be a minor road bump and not a major obstacle.